How to Improve Yourself

Self-improvement is universal to the human experience; we all have things we’d like to change about ourselves. Perhaps you want to lose weight, improve your skills in a certain area, be more comfortable socially, be happier, or more productive. Whatever the ultimate improvement desired, in order to achieve it you may benefit from identifying your specific goals, enacting change, and coping with setbacks.

EditSteps

EditIdentifying Goals

1. Imagine what it could be like in the future. Thinking about future positive and negative possibilities enhances motivation, expectation of successful goal completion, and commitment to self-improvement.^[1] Thinking about a positive future helps you imagine a reality where you are the best self you can be, while imagining a negative reality results in an awareness of what might happen if you do not meet your improvement goals.
   
   • Imagine a miracle happened overnight and when woke up in the morning you were exactly how you want to be. Everything you wanted to improve about yourself happened in the middle of the night somehow. How are you different? How does it feel? Who is around you? What are you doing? Imagine what it would be like to live life as this completely improved self. Based on what you imagine, you can begin developing goals. Perhaps you imagined yourself as being confident and physically fit. What do you think would have needed to happen for this to occur?
2. Determine what needs improvement and what doesn't. It is important to be specific in your goals, and to know which goals are a top priority.^[2]
   
   • Identify your assets (honest, hard-working, loving...etc.) and your liabilities (angry, overweight...etc.). This may help you identify the areas in which you want to make the most improvement.
   • Prioritize your list of goals. Rate each goal from 1-10, 10 being the highest priority for you. Focus on this goal first.
3. Get feedback. Receiving feedback about what to improve upon helps individuals’ performance on tasks, and enhances goal-achievement.^[3] Thus, asking others ways you can improve will help you develop specific goals and motivate you on your journey.
   
   • Start by asking your significant other or family members ways they think you can improve yourself. Make sure you only ask individuals whom you trust and those that will take your feelings into consideration (rather than belittling or criticizing you).^[4] You might be surprised by their answers.
   • Talk to a trusted confidante such as a therapist, a religious leader or even a "sponsor" in a 12 step group. Having an outside party helps reduce self-deception and denial. We sometimes have a problem of being either too hard or too soft on ourselves, but talking to others can help us form an accurate picture of ourselves if we are to improve.
   • Pick which suggestions you can apply to yourself and to practice those suggestions. If a certain set doesn't seem to work, try another! Nothing works for everyone. You need to find what works for you!
4. Make SMART goals. SMART goals are specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound.^[5][6] For example, your goal could be to lose 20 pounds (specific, measurable, attainable) in 3 months (realistic, time-bound).
   
   • Try this online resource for creating SMART goals at GetSelfHelp.Co.UK.^[7]
   • Break down each goal into smaller goals. For example, if your goal is to lose 20 pounds you will need to develop a plan which will include smaller goals such as: lowering daily calorie intake, exercising 3-5 times per week, and limiting sugar intake.
   • Instead of making grand goals, start by establishing little goals that achieve the grand goal. For instance losing 50 pounds may seem like a daunting task but something like no chocolate for a week may be more viable.
5. Seek out information on how to pursue that change. Information can be gathered from books, articles, friends, family, and professionals. It is amazing how much information will find you when you are ready!
   
   • Think about ways you have made similar positive changes in the past. If you haven’t, think about how others have achieved what you want.^[8] Talk to people who are in your same position and ask for help.^[9] For example, if you want to lose weight, you could sign up for Weight Watchers and go to groups at the center.

EditEnacting Change

1. Make sure you are ready to change. There are 4 stages of change according to the Transtheoretical Model of behavior change.^[10] Identifying which stage you are in can help you determine whether you are ready to make a change or if you need more motivation.
   
   • Pre-contemplation stage: This stage is when there is a problem but you are not aware of it or you are denying it.
   • Contemplation: You are aware of a problem and are contemplating changing it. People can become stuck on this step for a long time until they move on.^[11] You may be in this stage if you are still deciding what to change about yourself.
   • Preparation: You have committed to change and are making a plan of action. You may be in this stage if you are working on your goals.
   • Action: Making the changes. You are in this stage if you are working on your plan on a daily basis. You have a plan and are currently moving toward your goal.
   • Maintenance: You have completed your goal and are maintaining your progress.
2. Be your own coach. Self-coaching or checking in with yourself on a daily basis has been linked to increases in self-improvement, especially in terms of leadership qualities.^[12] Daily check-ins facilitate awareness of your current performance and your ability to achieve goals.
   
   • Ask yourself questions like, “Did I focus on or work toward my goals today? Did I have a positive attitude today? Was I kind to myself today? Did I accept my challenges today? Did I change something for the better today?”
3. Consider outside help. If you find that self-coaching is not helping and you need some outside support, life-coaching has been associated with positive change, and goal-realization.^[13] Additionally, therapists and psychologists are typically trained in interventions to assist you in achieving personal goals, such as Solution Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT).
   
4. Practice, practice, practice! Change may come slowly especially if it is a large self-improvement. Just keep going until your goal is your new reality (the changed you).
   
   • Remind yourself about your specific goals on a daily basis.

EditCoping with Setbacks

1. Acknowledge that setbacks are normal. If change moved vertically, we’d all have an easier time making personal modifications. The truth is, change does not typically follow a distinct path and there may be rocks in the road.
   
   • For example, in weight loss it is not common for someone to continue to lose weight every single day. Some days you may not lose any weight, and some days you may gain some weight. The key is not letting these inevitable fluctuations cause you to give up on your goal. What is important is that overall, you lose weight over time. Know that you can do anything you put your mind to (that is reasonable of course)!
   • Make a list of possible setbacks that may occur during your journey toward self-improvement. Identify ways to deal with each setback.
2. Focus on what you will do in the future. Dwelling on what you did wrong does not help you achieve goals. However, focusing on what you can do now and in the future helps you to. Instead of letting the rock in your path stop your journey, focus on moving forward and learning how to better deal with rocks in the future. You can go around or jump over the rocks.
   
   • For example, if you wanted to lose weight and ending up gaining a pound over the weekend, instead of thinking negatively and giving up on your goal, think something like, "it's okay to have a little fluctuation in weight. I'm going to continue to feed my body healthy foods!"
3. Accept and affirm yourself. Research indicates that individuals who accept their challenges can actually be more motivated toward positive change.^[14] Additionally, individuals who affirm or validate themselves often are more able to think about and understand their challenges.^[15]
   
   • Recognize your strengths and your challenges, even if you have to list all of them down.
   • Understand yourself as an outside observer.^[16] Try to objectively look at yourself by observing your behaviors such as how you act, speak, and think around other people.

EditTips

• Make sure that when you go to bed you feel you've accomplished something that day - it doesn't have to be something life changing in itself, but making the effort to be a little nicer or read a few more pages of that book EVERY day will have more of an impact than occasional large things.
• Be patient with yourself. Pat yourself on your back for "victories" and give yourself a break if you back slide. "Rome wasn't built in a day"! Just keep at it as you are able. Good luck and good for you!
• Trust the process and always believe in yourself.

EditRelated wikiHows

• Be Smart
• Improve As a Person (Girls)
• Improve Your Handwriting
• Get Fit

EditSources and Citations

Cite error: <ref> tags exist, but no <references/> tag was found

How to Help a Dog Overcome a Fear of Fireworks or Thunder

According to a survey by the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA), around 49% of dogs show a fear of loud noises, including fireworks or thunderstorms.^[1] Unfortunately, many owners accidentally reinforce their dog's anxiety by petting or fussing over the dog when it is anxious. This action tells the dog that they are doing the right thing to act afraid and the petting reinforces the fearful behavior.^[2] In the short term there are strategies that can help decrease the dog's' fear, and in the long term you can attempt to desensitize the dog to loud noises so that it is no longer so fearful.

EditSteps

EditUsing Short-Term Strategies

1. Minimize the stimulation. Insulate your dog from the bright lights and loud noises of storms and fireworks. Bring the dog indoors, and close all windows and doors. Draw the curtains so the dog can't see the flashes. If appropriate (not during an electrical storm) put the TV on with the volume low, to act as a distraction. Remember to act normally and go about your normal business so as to send out the message that everything is OK and you aren't worried.^[3]
   
2. Give the dog a safe place to hide. A fearful dog instinctively wants to hide. If the dog chooses to go to ground and hide under a bed or behind a sofa then let it. You may wish to provide additional security by laying a blanket over the edge of the bed to provide additional sound insulation.
   
   • If the dog is crate trained, it may wish to go to its crate. Cover most of the crate with a thick blanket so that it is even more cave-like and secure than normal. Place something with your scent on it inside the crate to add to the dog's feelings of security.^[4]
   • If your dog is not crate trained then consider doing so as part of your strategy for helping him overcome this fear.
3. Use pheromones. When a lot of fireworks are anticipated plug-in DAP diffuser in your house beforehand. These devices give off a synthetic dog pheromone that makes dogs feel safe and secure. The diffusers help to give an anxious dog heightened feelings of security, and can diffuse some of its anxiety.
   
4. Put a Thundershirt on the dog. These work by fitting the dog snugly and pressing against its body. This is akin to swaddling a young baby, which gives a sense of security and safety. For some dogs it takes the edge off of the anxiety and helps to bolster their confidence.^[5]
   
5. Consider using medications. Some dogs are so fearful they try to escape, harm themselves, or lose control of their bladder or bowels. If your dog has this type of extreme anxiety then get it checked by your vet. If there is no medical explanation for the dog's extreme fear, then the vet may be able to prescribe medications to calm the dog during the event.
   
   • There is no one drug that is perfect, but one useful combination is diazepam and propranolol. Diazepam is a tranquilizer, which lessens the feelings of anxiety, while propranolol is a beta blocker, which prevents the heart from racing. This combination helps to keep the animal relaxed during a scary event.^[6]
   • Acepromazine (ACP) sedates the dog but it still experiences the fear. So externally the dog seems improved, but it is still fearful. This is why this drug has fallen out of favor.===Using Short-Term Strategies===
6. Minimize the stimulation. Insulate your dog from the bright lights and loud noises of storms and fireworks. Bring the dog indoors, and close all windows and doors. Draw the curtains so the dog can't see the flashes. If appropriate (not during an electrical storm) put the TV on with the volume low, to act as a distraction. Remember to act normally and go about your normal business so as to send out the message that everything is OK and you aren't worried.^[7]
   
7. Give the dog a safe place to hide. A fearful dog instinctively wants to hide. If the dog chooses to go to ground and hide under a bed or behind a sofa then let it. You may wish to provide additional security by laying a blanket over the edge of the bed to provide additional sound insulation.
   
   • If the dog is crate trained, it may wish to go to its crate. Cover most of the crate with a thick blanket so that it is even more cave-like and secure than normal. Place something with your scent on it inside the crate to add to the dog's feelings of security.^[8]
   • If your dog is not crate trained then consider doing so as part of your strategy for helping him overcome this fear.
8. Use pheromones. When a lot of fireworks are anticipated plug-in DAP diffuser in your house beforehand. These devices give off a synthetic dog pheromone that makes dogs feel safe and secure. The diffusers help to give an anxious dog heightened feelings of security, and can diffuse some of its anxiety.
   
9. Put a Thundershirt on the dog. These work by fitting the dog snugly and pressing against its body. This is akin to swaddling a young baby, which gives a sense of security and safety. For some dogs it takes the edge off of the anxiety and helps to bolster their confidence.^[9]
   
10. Consider using medications. Some dogs are so fearful they try to escape, harm themselves, or lose control of their bladder or bowels. If your dog has this type of extreme anxiety then get it checked by your vet. If there is no medical explanation for the dog's extreme fear, then the vet may be able to prescribe medications to calm the dog during the event.
    
    • There is no one drug that is perfect, but one useful combination is diazepam and propranolol. Diazepam is a tranquilizer, which lessens the feelings of anxiety, while propranolol is a beta blocker, which prevents the heart from racing. This combination helps to keep the animal relaxed during a scary event.^[10]
    • Acepromazine (ACP) sedates the dog but it still experiences the fear. So externally the dog seems improved, but it is still fearful. This is why this drug has fallen out of favor.===Using Short-Term Strategies===
11. Minimize the stimulation. Insulate your dog from the bright lights and loud noises of storms and fireworks. Bring the dog indoors, and close all windows and doors. Draw the curtains so the dog can't see the flashes. If appropriate (not during an electrical storm) put the TV on with the volume low, to act as a distraction. Remember to act normally and go about your normal business so as to send out the message that everything is OK and you aren't worried.^[11]
    
12. Give the dog a safe place to hide. A fearful dog instinctively wants to hide. If the dog chooses to go to ground and hide under a bed or behind a sofa then let it. You may wish to provide additional security by laying a blanket over the edge of the bed to provide additional sound insulation.
    
    • If the dog is crate trained, it may wish to go to its crate. Cover most of the crate with a thick blanket so that it is even more cave-like and secure than normal. Place something with your scent on it inside the crate to add to the dog's feelings of security.^[12]
    • If your dog is not crate trained then consider doing so as part of your strategy for helping him overcome this fear.
13. Use pheromones. When a lot of fireworks are anticipated plug-in DAP diffuser in your house beforehand. These devices give off a synthetic dog pheromone that makes dogs feel safe and secure. The diffusers help to give an anxious dog heightened feelings of security, and can diffuse some of its anxiety.
    
14. Put a Thundershirt on the dog. These work by fitting the dog snugly and pressing against its body. This is akin to swaddling a young baby, which gives a sense of security and safety. For some dogs it takes the edge off of the anxiety and helps to bolster their confidence.^[13]
    
15. Consider using medications. Some dogs are so fearful they try to escape, harm themselves, or lose control of their bladder or bowels. If your dog has this type of extreme anxiety then get it checked by your vet. If there is no medical explanation for the dog's extreme fear, then the vet may be able to prescribe medications to calm the dog during the event.
    
    • There is no one drug that is perfect, but one useful combination is diazepam and propranolol. Diazepam is a tranquilizer, which lessens the feelings of anxiety, while propranolol is a beta blocker, which prevents the heart from racing. This combination helps to keep the animal relaxed during a scary event.^[14]
    • Acepromazine (ACP) sedates the dog but it still experiences the fear. So externally the dog seems improved, but it is still fearful. This is why this drug has fallen out of favor.===Using Short-Term Strategies===
16. Minimize the stimulation. Insulate your dog from the bright lights and loud noises of storms and fireworks. Bring the dog indoors, and close all windows and doors. Draw the curtains so the dog can't see the flashes. If appropriate (not during an electrical storm) put the TV on with the volume low, to act as a distraction. Remember to act normally and go about your normal business so as to send out the message that everything is OK and you aren't worried.^[15]
    
17. Give the dog a safe place to hide. A fearful dog instinctively wants to hide. If the dog chooses to go to ground and hide under a bed or behind a sofa then let it. You may wish to provide additional security by laying a blanket over the edge of the bed to provide additional sound insulation.
    
    • If the dog is crate trained, it may wish to go to its crate. Cover most of the crate with a thick blanket so that it is even more cave-like and secure than normal. Place something with your scent on it inside the crate to add to the dog's feelings of security.^[16]
    • If your dog is not crate trained then consider doing so as part of your strategy for helping him overcome this fear.
18. Use pheromones. When a lot of fireworks are anticipated plug-in DAP diffuser in your house beforehand. These devices give off a synthetic dog pheromone that makes dogs feel safe and secure. The diffusers help to give an anxious dog heightened feelings of security, and can diffuse some of its anxiety.
    
19. Put a Thundershirt on the dog. These work by fitting the dog snugly and pressing against its body. This is akin to swaddling a young baby, which gives a sense of security and safety. For some dogs it takes the edge off of the anxiety and helps to bolster their confidence.^[17]
    
20. Consider using medications. Some dogs are so fearful they try to escape, harm themselves, or lose control of their bladder or bowels. If your dog has this type of extreme anxiety then get it checked by your vet. If there is no medical explanation for the dog's extreme fear, then the vet may be able to prescribe medications to calm the dog during the event.
    
    • There is no one drug that is perfect, but one useful combination is diazepam and propranolol. Diazepam is a tranquilizer, which lessens the feelings of anxiety, while propranolol is a beta blocker, which prevents the heart from racing. This combination helps to keep the animal relaxed during a scary event.^[18]
    • Acepromazine (ACP) sedates the dog but it still experiences the fear. So externally the dog seems improved, but it is still fearful. This is why this drug has fallen out of favor.===Using Short-Term Strategies===
21. Minimize the stimulation. Insulate your dog from the bright lights and loud noises of storms and fireworks. Bring the dog indoors, and close all windows and doors. Draw the curtains so the dog can't see the flashes. If appropriate (not during an electrical storm) put the TV on with the volume low, to act as a distraction. Remember to act normally and go about your normal business so as to send out the message that everything is OK and you aren't worried.^[19]
    
22. Give the dog a safe place to hide. A fearful dog instinctively wants to hide. If the dog chooses to go to ground and hide under a bed or behind a sofa then let it. You may wish to provide additional security by laying a blanket over the edge of the bed to provide additional sound insulation.
    
    • If the dog is crate trained, it may wish to go to its crate. Cover most of the crate with a thick blanket so that it is even more cave-like and secure than normal. Place something with your scent on it inside the crate to add to the dog's feelings of security.^[20]
    • If your dog is not crate trained then consider doing so as part of your strategy for helping him overcome this fear.
23. Use pheromones. When a lot of fireworks are anticipated plug-in DAP diffuser in your house beforehand. These devices give off a synthetic dog pheromone that makes dogs feel safe and secure. The diffusers help to give an anxious dog heightened feelings of security, and can diffuse some of its anxiety.
    
24. Put a Thundershirt on the dog. These work by fitting the dog snugly and pressing against its body. This is akin to swaddling a young baby, which gives a sense of security and safety. For some dogs it takes the edge off of the anxiety and helps to bolster their confidence.^[21]
    
25. Consider using medications. Some dogs are so fearful they try to escape, harm themselves, or lose control of their bladder or bowels. If your dog has this type of extreme anxiety then get it checked by your vet. If there is no medical explanation for the dog's extreme fear, then the vet may be able to prescribe medications to calm the dog during the event.
    
    • There is no one drug that is perfect, but one useful combination is diazepam and propranolol. Diazepam is a tranquilizer, which lessens the feelings of anxiety, while propranolol is a beta blocker, which prevents the heart from racing. This combination helps to keep the animal relaxed during a scary event.^[22]
    • Acepromazine (ACP) sedates the dog but it still experiences the fear. So externally the dog seems improved, but it is still fearful. This is why this drug has fallen out of favor.

EditTraining a Dog to Overcome Fear of Loud Noises

1. Act normally. It is important that the owner ignores any fearful behavior the dog is displaying. While it is perfectly natural to want to reassure an animal in distress, in reality it trains the dog to give in to the distressed behavior. Retraining is doomed from the start unless you understand this.^[23]
   
   • By acting unconcerned you send out a strong message that you are not worried and therefore the dog has nothing to be fearful of.
2. Never force a dog to face its fears head on. In other words, don't take a fearful dog to a fireworks show and expect it to adjust. This is a technique called sensory flooding and it is inhumane. The dog is bombarded by what it fears and instead of overcoming that fear, the dog may become traumatized and emotionally damaged instead.
   
3. Exposure the dog to a very low level of the feared sound. Train the dog to remain calm during the sound by rewarding calm behavior with a treat or affection.^[24] This is different than sensory flooding because you are using very low levels of sound and working gradually.
   
   • To do this, purchase a CD of the sound the dog fears, for example fireworks or thunderstorms. The idea is to play the CD on the lowest possible volume so that the dog remains calm. Praise the dog and reward it for being calm in the presence of the sounds.
   • If possible, leave the CD playing quietly in the background for an hour at a time but don't leave the dog alone while it is playing.
4. Gradually increase the volume of the feared sound. Once the dog is regularly taking no notice of the quiet background sounds, turn the volume up a tiny amount. This should be slightly louder than previously, but not enough to make the dog shows signs of anxiety, such as lip licking, pacing, whining, shivering, or shaking.
   
   • Again, reward the dog with love or treats for being in the presence of the alarming noise, but not being fearful of it.
   • Repeat this exposure until you are sure the dog is not reacting at all, and then you are ready to turn the volume up one more notch.
5. Expose the dog to the CD sounds on a daily basis. If at any stage the dog becomes fearful, restart the next session with the volume one notch lower. Don't forget to act very relaxed yourself while doing this training. The dog needs to see that you are unconcerned.
   
   • It may take a large amount of time, but with determination and dedication, it is possible to help your dog overcome its fear of fireworks or thunder.

EditTips

• Remember that loud noises are often worse for dogs than humans because dogs have such sensitive hearing. They may be aware of an approaching storm half an hour before it arrives. Then when the fireworks or thunder do start, what is uncomfortable to our ears is so much worse to sensitive canine ears.

EditSources and Citations

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How to Read Guitar Music

This article will cover the basics of how to read guitar sheet music. This is not about how to read tabs––rather, it's about music written in standard notation. Guitar music is written on the treble clef, the upper half of the grand staff. Guitar music is transposed up one octave, meaning that what you are actually playing sounds one octave lower than what is written. Music is often transposed to make it easier to read.

Note: This article is to help read sheet music, click here for help reading guitar tab.

EditSteps

EditUnderstanding the Staff

1. Recognize the musical staff. You know you have written music when you see five lines, capped off on the ends. On the far left will be a "clef" (a italicized "G" or "C" shape), a set of numbers, like , and a set of hashes or flats denoting the key. Together, these elements make up a musical staff.
   
   
   • Guitar is also written as "tablature," a unique music-writing system for guitar. Tabs resembles traditional musical staffs but have six lines instead of five, no clef, and often say "Tab" on the far left side.
   • Guitar music is always written in "treble clef." This means the symbol on the far left is always a cursive G, with the bottom looping around the second-lowest line of the staff.^[1]
2. Memorize the notes of each line in the staff using the acronym "Every Good Boy Does Fine." Each line in the staff signifies a note, like an A, an E, etc. When there is a note symbol on the line, you play that note -- but you have to know which line is which note. Starting from the bottom, the notes are E - G - B - D - F, or the acronym "Every Good Boy Does Fine"
   
   
3. Memorize the spaces between the lines using the acronym "FACE." The spaces in between the lines also denote notes, meaning that the staff, in total, covers nine different notes (not counting sharps and flats, which will be covered later). From the bottom up, the spaces signify the notes F - A - C - E, or "FACE." Including the spaces, the final staff from looks like:
   
   
   • F
   • E
   • D
   • C
   • B
   • A
   • G
   • F
   • E
4. Use lines above and below the basic staff, known as ledger lines, to get higher and lower notes. If you see small little lines above and below the staff, these are simply to extend the range of the sheet music beyond the five lines on the staff.
   
   
   • Each line has a note above and below, and you need to memorize it as you move forward. For now, however, just work on the basics.
5. Read the key signatures, made of sharp, flat, and natural signs, to know what key the song is in. The key signature is between the staff and the time signature. It will be made up of some combination of three signals -- ♯, ♭, ♮ -- lined up on the staff. You'll need to memorize key signatures to know them -- the one in the video above is the key of D. However, they still give useful information if you don't know the key:
   
   
   • Depending on what line the symbol fall on, you adjust that note. In the example above, there is a sharp on the F line, and one on the C space. This means any note on these lines you 'must make a sharp. This automatically keeps you in key.
6. Use time signatures to determine the rhythm of the song. Time signatures tell you how many beats per measure in the song. The most common is , which means that each measure consists of "four quarter-note beats." This is just a complicated way to say you count out "1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1... etc." to keep time with the song. Other time signatures, like , changes the number of beats in the measure -- in this case "three quarter-note beats," as in "1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, 1...."
   
   
7. Use the vertical bars in the staff to find the end of each measure. There are often numbers above each line, telling you which measure you're on to help coordinate with a band.
   
   
8. Recognize the different types of notes. The placement of a note on the line or space tells you what note to play -- they type of note tells you how long to play it. A whole note is played for the whole measure, a half note for half a measure, and so on down to thirty-second notes. For now, just get used to the different types of notes you're likely to encounter:
   
   
   • Whole notes: O
   • Half notes: A whole note with a vertical tail, a quarter note with a hollow center.
   • Quarter notes: ♩
   • Rests: are times to not play -- they are either thick "--" marks for whole and half rests and squiggles for quarter note rests.

EditUnderstanding Complex Notations

1. Hold notes for lines curving underneath two or more notes. If there is a concave line between two notes (it bends downward), then you want to hold the notes
   
   
2. Let lines arcing over notes tell you when to hammer on and pull off. This is known as "legato," where every note is slightly blended together. Use hammer-ons and pull-offs to glide between these notes as seamlessly as possible.
   
   
3. Repeat any sections book ended by the bold, vertical "repeat" sign. These come at the end of a measure. The normal vertical bar is bolded, with a colon (:) right before it. This means you go back to the last time you saw this symbol and repeat the playing until you get back again.
   
   
4. Use the string indicators to know which specific note you're supposed to play. Do you play the A on the fifth string or the second? Guitar tab will have a helpful number circled above the note telling you which string to play on.
   
   
5. Use finger indicators next to the note to help with positioning. If there is a small number next to the note, it is telling you to use a specific finger. Your first finger is your index finger, your fourth is your pinky.
   
   
6. Research more complicated notes and notation as you grow as a musician. There a lot more notes out there that, while less common in guitar music, are worth knowing. The first thing that you should explore are different notes -- from sixteenth notes down the eighth note rests.
   
   
   • Check out the general "How to Read Music" to get deeper insights into music theory and expand your knowledge past just guitar music.

EditVideo

EditTips

• While learning to read music is important, know that most guitar parts are written out in the much more intuitive tablature notation, or "guitar tab."

EditSources and Citations

• Videos from GuitarLessons.com

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How to Start a New Life with a Negative Past

Leaving old ways behind can be daunting because we become used to living a certain way and change can be scary.^[1] When the pain of staying the same overcomes the fear of change, you can put in an effort to start a new life. Your changes won’t occur overnight but by taking responsibility for yourself and putting in some effort, you can improve your reputation and your life.

EditSteps

EditWorking Toward a Better Future

1. Set goals for yourself. Think about what it is that you want to achieve that will make your future better than your present and past circumstances. Write down clear, concise goals you can work towards. Make sure your goals are realistic, specific, measurable, time-based and achievable.
   
   • Consider also the things that you DON’T want in your life.
   • Start work on one goal at a time.
   • Break your goals into small, manageable steps. These will help you accomplish your goals over time.
2. Gather a support system. Think of people who will be a good influence on you and help you accomplish your goals. If you’re moving to a new place and don’t have many friends, consider maintaining contact with some of your old good friends and also making new ones. Reach out to family who have been loving and supportive of you in the past. Nurture your relationship with them; be honest, trustworthy and kind -- this will show them you want to turn over a new leaf.
   
   • Your support system can include figures of authority in your life such as your teachers. Seek their advice and follow through on it, if you believe you can confide in them. Such connections can also help you out in the future when your life is more stable and you need someone to put in a good word for you, such as for a job application or a college reference.
3. Avoid negative people. Distance yourself from friends who were negative influences in your life. If such people are not also trying to start over in life, then they might pull you back into habits, behavior or activities that made your past negative.^[2] These friends might also mock you and tease you for trying to leave your old ways behind. Ignore them and focus on improving your life.
   
   • Make sure you have people to talk to and to support you through this transition.
4. Deal with things one day at a time. Make sure the goals you set take daily living into account. At the beginning of every day, reflect on your schedule for that day and what it is you have to go through, what you need to do to prepare. At the end of the day, reflect on how your day was and what progress you made. It’s okay if it wasn’t as much as you’d like. What matters is that you keep trying.
   
   • Your negative past probably spanned a long period of time. Whether you’re trying to leave your old ways behind or to distance yourself from a negative situation created by others (e.g. an abusive relationship), things probably won’t become completely perfect overnight. Negative habits, behaviors, and methods of coping with stressful situations all take time to develop and time to be replaced with positive, alternative ones.^[3]
5. Take personal responsibility. You have direct control over your thoughts, your emotions, your behavior and your life.^[4] Make the decision to follow your goals and improve your life. Actively choose what to do next. Every morning, look in the mirror and say confidently, ‘I control my life. My choices today make a better tomorrow.’^[5]
   
   • No matter who was responsible for the events of your past, you have to take responsibility for improving your present and future. Remember that you can only control yourself and your actions but that your actions affect others and the future.^[6]
   • It can be easy to sit back and blame others for the way you are -- don’t use that as an excuse to continue living a life you’re not satisfied with.

EditAccepting and Dealing with the Past

1. Seek therapy. A therapist will offer you a confidential, non-judgemental space to work through your thoughts, concerns, and problems and help you better define and work towards your goals.^[7] Therapists have the skills and resources needed to help you put your life into perspective and see things from angles that may not have occurred to you or others.
   
   • Therapy is not only for those who face problems with mental health. Anyone who wants to can benefit from speaking to a counsellor or therapist. ^[8] If you are uncomfortable going to a therapist/counsellor because you’re afraid people will make fun of you, discuss your fears with someone you trust, someone you know has been to therapy or research online to understand the process of therapy better.
2. Face consequences. Try to separate yourself as much as you can from your old way of life. It can be difficult if you’re trying to turn over a new leaf but are going to be living in the same place and attending the same school or staying at the same job. You may have to face consequences of your past behavior before your reputation improves.
   
   • You will have to keep trying your hardest to show that you have changed: let your actions speak for themselves.
   • Accept any punishments that are dealt to you by authority figures (e.g. your principal or boss) and try to perform to the best of your ability. This will be a way of showing that you can accept responsibility for your actions.
3. Make amends with loved ones. You may have grievances with others that are making your present difficult or miserable. Perhaps you had a big fight with your brother and he doesn’t talk to you anymore. Working toward a better relationship may improve your situation and give you peace of mind.^[9] Accept if you were to blame for anything that made the situation worse.
   
   • Apologize and indicate that you want to make things better. Tell your loved one that you’re sorry for what happened, explain how you think you hurt him and why this was wrong. Then tell him how you can make it better. A simple script to follow is:
     • I’m sorry for…
     • This is wrong because…
     • In the future, I will…
     • Will you forgive me?^[10]
   • Your loved one may not forgive you immediately. Keep trying.
4. Forgive yourself. When you take responsibility for your life, you may be feeling guilty about the part you played (or the part you think you played) in making it negative in the first place.^[11] Consider discussing this with a trusted friend. Explain how you feel and why you think you’re feeling that way.
   
   • Your friend might be able to show you a different perspective. If you don’t want to talk about it, try writing your thoughts out, then responding in writing as you would to someone you love. Be honest and forthright.
   • Making mistakes does not decrease your worth or make you a bad person.^[12] Everybody makes mistakes.

EditPreventing a Return to Your Old Ways

1. Understand the problem. It may have taken you a long time to reach a point in your life when you decided you needed to start over. Alternatively, you could have been in a negative family situation since you were born and then decided that you needed to make life better. Whatever your case, try to determine the contributing factors to the situation.
   
   • Think about things people said and did, patterns of behavior (your own and others’), tones of voice, and patterns of your own thinking.
   • Make a list of negative things you tend to repeat to yourself. Find evidence for and against this thought. Look for facts, rather than opinion. Ask yourself what makes you think this way.
2. Take precautions against making mistakes. Put systems in place that will ensure that you don’t repeat the negative things that happened in the past. Create plans to follow whenever you notice feelings that trigger behavior that you regret. For example, perhaps you’ve noticed that when you feel sad, you tend to drink alcohol: form a plan for dealing with your sadness that will keep you from drinking.
   
   • Talk to a friend and ask him to help you with this problem. When you’re feeling sad, you can call him and ask them to come over. You can both play a sport or do something different. You could even try to talk about what is making you feel sad to help you deal with the situation.
   • Try to come up with more than one plan to follow in these situations in case something prevents you from following your original one.
3. Learn from your past. If you understand why things happened the way they did, try to think of solutions that will prevent history from repeating. If other people are the reason that your life was negative, it can be more difficult to change the situation. For example, if you’re a teenager and your parents make your home life difficult, maybe you can encourage your parents to seek help for their lifestyle.
   
   • You know your loved one best. It can be difficult to convince others to seek the help they need to better their life. Think of ways that you can help him yourself, consult with others on how best to approach the situation or read psychology articles related to your issue.
4. Form new habits and routines. You can’t simply stop doing things -- you have to start doing other activities to replace them.^[13] For example, if you had a habit of coming home from school and smoking in your room, form a routine that will help you achieve your goals instead. Plan ahead and ask a friend to help you, if you like. Once you come home, wash up, eat lunch then immediately leave for the public library to study.
   
   • New habits may be harder to form than new routines. Start by consciously engaging in behavior that you want to become habit. Take for example, trying to maintain your personal hygiene. Make a conscious effort to brush your teeth before going to bed and after waking up in the morning. Set a daily reminder on your phone to help you or ask a parent to check that you’ve brushed your teeth. Once this becomes habit, you’ll feel uncomfortable if you don’t brush your teeth at these times.
5. Make better choices. In your day to day life and in the long run, keep your goals in mind when you’re making decisions. Think about how your decision will affect your day and your future. Remember the poor choices you’ve made in the past. Choose that which is better for you.
   
   • Sometimes, you might make a decision that would have worked for you in the past but doesn’t any more. Maybe playing video games used to refresh your mind and now it doesn’t bring you that same peace of mind. This is okay. You can outgrow anything.^[14] Don’t force yourself to do something that no longer serves you well.

EditTips

• Be kind to yourself and be patient with yourself. If you constantly criticize yourself for not accomplishing the things you want to, when you want to, you will have low self-esteem and lower motivation to change your life.^[15]
• Consider joining a support group if you don’t like the idea of one-on-one therapy.
• Habits take time to break and form because they are etched in the neural pathways of the brain and you engage in them without you consciously making a decision to do it. Don’t give up trying to break old habits and form new ones.^[16]
• Remember that you can only deal with the here and now to change what will come. You can’t change what happened in the past - only the way you think of it.^[17] Try to think of lessons you can take with you from the past and avoid making the same mistakes again.
• One of the consequences of your past may be that you run into people whom you no longer want to be friends with. If you can, learn to be polite but distant every time you run into such people. If they try to cause trouble by taunting and provoking you, either ignore them or ask them firmly to stop.

EditWarnings

• You do NOT have to put up with abuse of any sort in your life. If a loved one or a figure of authority (such as a teacher) is harming you, report the issue. A global list of domestic violence agencies can be found at the International Directory of Domestic Violence Agencies

EditRelated wikiHows

• Leave the Past Behind
• Forget About an Humiliating Experience
• Eradicate and Stop Negative Thoughts
• Overcome Guilt by Taking Responsibility
• Act Like an Animal

• Move to a New State As a Child

EditSources and Citations

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